Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Immigrant Daughter 52

This is a day I remember clearly because three years ago I lost the best thing I ever had,  my husband. I am thankful the Lord gave me good memories of our 58 years together. Here is a picture of his funeral and the presentation of the flag:getting carls flag

I am aware that we had times that we both had to struggle through that’s the way marriage is it takes equal effort because n0 one is perfect.  I can offer one word of advice do not say any thing in anger because that causes you to say words you really don’t mean. When you speak them you meant them and you can’t take them back. I was so glad I learned that growing up. That is one reason my one sister got along so well, we could get mad at each other and leave each other alone and after about fifteen minutes it would be over and could pick up right where we left off.

Oh I thought I could just pick up and go on but a  mental block caused me to not write. I didn’t think this would happen because I know he is in a better place and it’s where I want to be. I have to say I am existing and when I read Stick horse Cowgirls today it jolted me back to reality. Yes I am still here and I better get on with the task that the Lord’ given me, I have daughters and DIL that love me and have never seen me this  despondent so I had better take hold and walk with God and not on my own.  student prince

There is a Broadway play made into a movie call “The Student Prince” where his life is drastically changing because his father dies and now he will be king and he sings a song “I’ll Walk With  God From This Day On”, because he knows he could never do it alone. I guess I have been trying to do it myself. I know this must seem to you as rambling but I want you to know where I am coming from. I have to tell you that it is not easy but I am sure of the results.

Some years back Carl wrote this word he received when he was alone with God:

carl's poem

Our youngest daughter had a friend that put it in this form and had it framed for him. I want to thank Vee for her comment to my DIL it was a help to me.

I will get back to the part of my life that was a busy time in our lives. With kids going to school brought back memories of Toms River,  N. J. when the schools were so crowded the schools had to stagger starting time. We had three children and they each started school at a different time. They had to ride the bus making the schedules start earlier because of the bus ride which took longer to get to school, because of the territory they had to cover picking up kids. Much like it is today.

I make sure I am not on the road during the going to school time and the coming home  hour. The dogs always let me know when the kids are walking by from the school bus drop.

I remember when our kids liked to come home and play outside until supper. We lived in a small development,  Carl car pooled so I was able to have the car so go to work when the kids were in school. I worked for a dentist who let me work short hours.  The base at Lakehurst was not too far away. We purchased our first home for $16,500. It was a new 3 bedroom ranch with carport attached resting on a full basement placed on a corner lot. The egg farm owners sold part of the land for the development and they were next door to us one small block away. We were able to purchase fresh eggs all the time. That was a plus side to living there.

Our children grew up here until the oldest was about to enter the 9th grade. Those were good years for us with just the normal problems of a growing family that all parents go through. I will say this in comparison to today I am so glad we are not raising kids in today's’ world. Between the television and the internet I am not sure which robs our kids more of the innocence of youth.

Thank you for caring. Immigrant Daughter


  1. Awwww...this touched my heart. (Although I am happily married to my second husband, I lost my first husband first to divorce and a year later to death.) Thank you for mentioning that I had encouraged you. I was a little nervous when C let me know that you had written this post because, goodness knows, I never know what's going to come out of this mouth of mine. I'm glad that it was encouragement and I believe that you'll be able, having "gone there" to write again. One of the best pieces of advice that I received was to find a quiet place when I was feeling overwhelmed and just have at it: to let the tears go, to feel the sadness. Sometimes we just get too good at stuffing things. Your husband was a sweetie pie on this earth and he's cheering you on in the next more alive than he ever was before. God bless you as you carry on knowing how much you have lived such a love.

  2. Thank-you for this touching post, for writing from your heart.Please keep sharing.

  3. A lady in our church just lost her husband... they were married for over 60 years, he was 92, such a nice man. When I expressed condolences to her, she said, "I'm sure going to miss him..." I know you miss Carl. Thank you for continuing your writing, I really enjoy reading about your life. Your calm acceptance of life, and hope for the future is inspiring.